The Writer Within: Why I Became a Writer

On Monday, I discussed the how aspect of my journey to becoming a writer, and today, I want to explore the why. As with the how, the why will expand and explain what writing means to me and the various aspects of writing and its impact upon my life.

As a child, I never once thought authors were wealthy. Every time I looked up a favorite author, I learned that they made less than my parents and that they enjoyed a different quality of life than I did, with the few rare exceptions--Anne McCaffrey, for one, and Margaret Weis for another, and much, much later, J.K. Rowling. Once Rowling hit the scene, I did more research and learned she was fluke--a one in a billion author who made it so big that she could buy her own continent if she wanted.

I shrugged off the money aspect of writing. Mostly because, at the time, I was young and didn't have any bills to pay, and focused on honing my skills. As I aged, though, money became increasingly important. I picked up various jobs, working everything from a sample distributor at King Soopers to a Lane Inspector at Air Care Colorado. I've worked customer service jobs and given my time to small publishers as an editor--in many cases, for free--while trying to figure out how to make writing work for me as a career.

Most people have pushed me to try other careers, to go back to school numerous times in fields that simply don't interest me. I'm on the cusp of completing my Associate's Degree in Paralegal Studies, which is my backup plan, because, hey, I'm a people pleaser and I want to make my family happy first and foremost, and legal work, while tedious, is something I'd be good at and probably enjoy once out of school.

I'm also determined. Driven to a... well, the cliche is to a fault, but I feel like it's worse than that. I refuse to back down. I know this is the story I want to tell. I think about these books obsessively. Dream about them--seriously, dream about them--and practically breathe every word. I can't stop adding to The Amuli Chronicles and the various series and arcs within it. There's a grand tale here, a world so fascinating and huge that I want to explore every corner of it while being able to live my life here on Earth. And the stories, the drive to tell them, just won't stop. I've tried giving it up, truly, and I just... can't.

So, why do I write? Better yet, why did I become a writer, one of the professions that is most difficult to succeed in? Probably because I've never been one to back down from a challenge. In school, I always did the extra work. I worked hard and fought to get where I am today. I thrive off of difficulty (and here, let me note that difficulty is different from impossibility; I tried engineering, but my brain does not function in the same manner as an engineer's; engineering wasn't difficult for me, it was downright impossible... I spent more hours a week studying than my peers, and still could not get it... I know now that it's because my mind doesn't function in the way that is required for engineering, and I have a ton of respect for engineers, because like romance writers, it's something I cannot do, but admire to my core). And what could be more difficult than making a living off of art?

Art, a good that so many people dismiss as not having monetary worth... and I chose to make it my career. Not for money, not for the chance that I might make it big, but because I love what I do. The crazy deadlines, the insane way I push myself to always do more, more, more, to write more, to improve myself more, to create more stories and connect more plots and characters to one another. This is why I write.

My dad once said after reading The Soulbound Curse, "There are so many threads. How do you know readers will catch them all?" The short answer is, I don't. I can't assume a reader will catch everything, but that's the fun in these epic tales. A reader can enjoy one book, and then the others, and then as they continue through the series, there will be a moment somewhere along the line where their eyes will grow big, they'll stop reading and shout, "Wait a minute! Wait, wait, wait! That was back in book one!" And then they'll go and flip frantically though The Soulbound Curse to find the passage they're thinking of, and the second they find it--it's like Christmas, but a thousand times better, because you know. You and the author have a connection; the author gets the way you think.

And how do I know this feeling? Because I've had it only a handful of times, and only from my very favorite authors. It's a sensation that only the best of the best can give me, and something that I want to give to my readers. While working on The Soulless King, I've found myself having those moments with my own book. It's a little silly to say, but it's true. I have moments where I grin like an idiot and shout--often startling my cats--"THIS IS PERFECT!" I know the readers will enjoy it because I enjoyed it.

In a way, this is why I write. The complexity of a series, if done well, is one of the most delicious fictional meals, one that stimulates the mind and pushes me to think more about the books and the characters within, and to analyze my own life and choices. I strive to bring this same delicacy to my works. I plant so many threads in my novels because I plan to pull on each and every one of them.

You'll just have to wait and see how I do so. ;)

The Writer Within: How I Became a Writer

This is the first of a new blog series I'm starting, because I'd like to give back to the community of readers and authors that has supported me for the many years of my writing career. For the next few weeks, on my new Monday and Wednesday blog post slots, I'll be addressing writerly things, from how I became a writer (today's topic) to how I personally function as a writer: Do I plan my series? Do I wing it? You'll find out soon!

When I was a child, my mother and father read to me every night before bed. And I'm talking from infancy through my teen years. I was actually really upset when they stopped reading to me, because I missed the bonding time and listening to the various books. As a child, my parents read to me from picture books (of course), but also introduced me to works for older readers, from Anne McCaffrey's Dragon Riders of Pern to The Black Cauldron series and even, my personal favorite, MagForce 7's The Knights of the Black Earth, Robot Blues, and Hung Out.

On the nights that my mother didn't feel like reading--before I myself could read--she and I would make up our own stories. She still has the first book we ever wrote together, which she typed up on the first Apple Mac ever released to the public. She even started illustrating it. I think these nights inspired me the most, because they showed me I could make my very own stories. I didn't have to always rely on something or someone else to entertain me, and in many cases, this became super useful (unlike a lot of people, I can sit alone, in a room, in silence, not writing or doing anything, and be entertaining myself silently by telling myself a story; I had one boss who asked me why I rarely listened to music while I worked, and it was because I was spinning a tale in my head, and it was more interesting and made the time pass by faster than music would).

That talent has never vanished. I'll be listening to someone talk with one ear and have a story building behind my eyes. I can typically keep track of both the discussion at hand and the one in my head. And honestly, I'm not sure how that ability came about.

Before my teen years, I was an avid reader. As in, I always, always carried a book with me (typically one of the Animorphs), and I rarely spoke with my peers. I was... different. Very different. The one time I tried really interacting with peers by playing soccer, I went the wrong way and almost scored a goal for the other team.

Yeah.

I never really played with anyone after that, at least until Pokemon became popular. Then, man, I was all over that. Pokemon was my jam.

In junior high school, I still read, but less, because I found others like me who were bookish and weird and wrote a lot. These girls had an enormous impact on my life, and I miss them every day (I moved and fell out of touch due to massive anxiety problems and severe, debilitating depression). I'll never forget how we all dove deep into Sailor Moon and other anime (Gundam Wing and Revolutionary Girl Utena were my other two favorites) and wrote stories about them, posted them on our Websites (before Facebook and MySpace existed, most of us had our own Websites!), and discussed them every day. It was fun, and an amazing experience. I still have the enormous board of anime pictures my friends put together for me before I moved, and I'll never get rid of it.

Between fourth grade and junior high, I learned how to code HTML and Java Script on my own. My dad gave me a blank Internet Explorer page with a few tables on it, showed me how to view its source and how to edit and save the document (a text document), and wished me luck. Absolutely everything I know about coding Websites is self-taught. In the following years, my dad helped me with a few bugs, but the majority of the time, I simply viewed the source of a page and figured out what altered what via trial and error. I still code in text documents.

The reason this is important is because around this time, I became a huge, die-hard fan of Digimon, and I created my own Website for it. Through my Website, I met one of my best friends, Kossmoe aka Legend aka Julie. We wrote every night, and built a lifelong relationship through the Digimon FDD community (for those curious, I was the creator of Alana and Horkamon; I never became super popular, but people knew about me, which was kind of cool, even though my characters were totally Mary Sues and often contradicted themselves... hey, I was like 11 and the Internet was new).

I can't even begin to say how huge of an impact Julie and the FDD community (and my fanficitions) had on my writing career. By that time, I'd known for a long, long time that I wanted to be a writer. It was all I wanted to be. The only constant in my life. And through these communities and constant role playing and fanfiction writing, I learned how to tell a good story. I learned how to create memorable characters without making them Mary Sues. I learned how to express myself confidently and eloquently, and without Julie's encouragement and her own passion for writing, I'd likely have never followed through with my passion.

This time of my life--between fourth grade and the end of junior high school--also taught me how to construct long stories with numerous plots. Not all of them were followed through, but I tried. I failed, too. A lot. Perobably the most popular thing I've ever written is a Harry Potter fanfiction called Viktor Krum and the Misinformed Muggle. I still have people asking me when I'm going to update the sequel... and the sad truth is, I probably won't. I don't have time. I wrote the first fanfiction in high school during winter break, and after that, my obsession changed.

I went from reading a ton of books to writing the first few drafts of The Soulbound Curse. Over the next thirteen years, I worked on this single book, learning about the world, the characters, their motivations, and the plot I wanted to expand upon. It took me well over a decade (and numerous rejection letters and e-mails) to be signed. Evolved Publishing, the company that signed me, rejected me four years ago. I returned to them two years after their initial rejection, after a major rewrite of the book, and they agreed to sign me.

But my writing career, and my growth in writing, won't end here. I have so much I want to accomplish still. I became a writer at a young age. When my mom and dad weren't reading me me, I was creating plays and organizing my cousins to act out grand tales of love, loss, dragons, and heroes. I've written plays that have never seen the light of day and whole novels are packed away gathering dust. The moment I started thinking about stories and constructing them in my head, I never stopped.

And I hope I won't until the day I die. I hope that when I'm old and in a nursing home (if I'm not a cyborg by then), I'll be able to stare out the window and not see an empty sky, but dragons and wraiths and demons.

Because, once a writer, always a writer.

Great Stories, Dynamic Worlds, Compelling Characters: The Making of Cassia by Lanette Kauten

I would like to thank Evolved Publishing for sharing this brilliant blog on a rising women's fiction author! To read the original blog post, please click here.


About the Author

I grew up in the suburbs of Dallas, TX, and moved all the way over to the next county… so, not very far. In high school, I was a serious and determined student with the goal of becoming a psychologist. However, an artistic desire awakened inside me during my late teens, and I became enamored with artists of all strains, and Deep Ellum became a home for my soul.

After a couple of years, I realized I would have to grow up eventually (actually, my mom realized that for me), so I went to nursing school and once again became a serious and determined student. While in school, I became fascinated with research, and after a few years of working as a floor nurse, I went into nephrology research and loved it!

Because just about everything interests me, I eventually picked up my long-dead hobby of writing, which I’m happy to say is now a budding career.

Where does your story begin?
Cassia begins at a baseball game in the year 2010. My main character, Tanya, is there with her husband and a married couple he knows professionally. The woman peppers Tanya with questions about Cassia, insinuating she knows too much about Tanya’s past.

The next chapter starts twenty years in the past and details Tanya’s torrid relationship with the enigmatic Cassia.

Who are your main characters? What do they want? What will get in their way?
As a reporter living in Deep Ellum, all Tanya Falgoust wants is to be accepted as part of the underground arts district. But living among free thinkers and musicians doesn’t make her one of them. Then she meets the sensual, rebellious Cassia, a performance artist who struts onto the stage and into Tanya’s bed.

No one knows who Cassia is, but her beauty and talents as an actress and dancer captivate the local scene. Tanya is mesmerized, and they quickly form a relationship. A close friend warns Tanya about Cassia, but she brushes him off. But when Cassia refuses to divulge anything about herself, where she lives, or even her real name, Tanya starts to realize her friend was right. And the secrets her lover is hiding are deeper and more damaging than Tanya could imagine.

As the pull of their relationship deepens and becomes more volatile, Tanya must decide whether to break from her desire before she loses the one thing she wants most—connection to the musicians who have accepted her into their community.

Where does your setting fit with what we know, and where is it unique?
Cassia is set in an arts/bar district just east of downtown Dallas, which in itself makes the setting both familiar and unique. A lot of cities have a section that’s pretty much reserved for the boho lifestyle—East Village in New York, 6th Street in Austin, and pretty much all of Portland, to name a few. Dallas has such an area as well, called Deep Ellum.

The neighborhood started as a Freedman’s town and was a Blues and Jazz hotspot at one time. For decades, it sat nearly empty except for the few businesses that never moved from the area. In the 80s, a handful of people saw tremendous opportunity to make it into a place for local musicians and artists.

What books, movies, etc, might this story be similar to, and in what ways is it unique?
The first book to come to mind is Rules of Civility by Amor Towles, because of its structure, and because the main character is a woman looking back on a particular year of her life and how the events of that year changed the direction of the rest of her life. But 1939 New York (Rules of Civility) is very different from 1990 Dallas (Cassia).

A generational tie exists with the book Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel, as both her book and mine deal with the struggles of a young crop of Gen-Xers. Outside of Wurtzel’s book being a memoir and mine being a work of fiction, there is a difference in writing style and focus. While Prozac Nation deals with depression in young adults, Cassia focuses on the postmodern view of art and sexuality.

Are more stories planned in this series?
I don’t write book series, but I am working on a new novel with Cassia as the protagonist. Tanya won’t even appear as a cameo in this new book.

To purchase Kauten's Cassia, please visit Evolved Publishing's Website.